first post

Blogging...something I've thought about for many years now and just never got around to doing it.
But I often have something that I want to rant about, share or that's simply weighing on my mind, so why not have a place to put it down?
Frankly it could be more private than a journal, which someone could, in theory, find and read, if I chose not to let people know I have this. I'm not sure I get why anyone else in the world would care to read what I have to put out there anyway, most days.
Every since my ex read my diary while I was at work one day and confronted me on it (which made me wonder how long he'd been reading it), I haven't trusted putting personal thoughts down on paper where anyone could potentially find them. Mostly I keep them to myself.
Which just bottles and increases internal pressure.

There are many choices of what to start with here.
Mostly this afternoon has been a bad afternoon for the past hour or so, just like every afternoon for the past 3 weeks have been. Around the beginning of September I finished the final stage of "phasing down" off my meds and have been drug free completely. So far my brain has not been adapting to this very well. Every day there has been a period of badness. Usually around mid to late afternoon, although not always. For the first time this Autumn, there were actually tears about 30 min ago. Even on the lowest dose of meds and only taking every 2nd day and then every 3rd day, I did not have this. But no drugs at all has been a big adjustment. I'll give it a few more weeks, then consider whether I need to go back on, at the lowest dose.

Then I got the inspiration to finally start that long thought-about blog.

I still don't know what I'll do with this space right now.

But this is a start.